Probably THE Most Important Letter I Want You to Read

One of my biggest fears is to die ahead of time, before I get the chance to watch you and your future sibling(s) grow and be assured that you guys are going to be fine. That is the major reason why I set up this blog and hope that you will someday read all the stuff I write in here, just in case I won't get the chance to share with you my two cents worth on life and everything else. Many things will happen. If it's not death, other things might get between us. It could be distance, it could be pride, it could be something so small that escalates to something big and causes a rift between you and me. It could be so many things. But I pray to God that none of this will happen, Micah.... I can't even imagine being there; to lose my babies in any way after loving you, holding you, and having you for so long. I pray that no matter what happens, you will always know that I love you. Always know that I love you...

But of course, you're only two now. And you have yet the ability to understand what am I babbling about. We have a long way to go and I might (or might not) have all the time in the world to raise you and share with you the things that I feel are important in life. But just in case, just in case, these letters are written with the hope to help you grow and cope with the gazillion things that will come your way as you grow...

I couldn't possibly tell you ALL the wisdom and useful ramblings that matter and will help you with life. I am afterall only 27. Haha. I'm probably not wise enough to even try and teach you things about life and adulthood. But I'll try to impart to you what's within my capacity...

And to start off, there is this one song that I have always listened to since its release in 1999. I was only 14 then, and I never really measure the weight of the song and its ultimate value. Not until I was 21 that I really listened to Baz Luhrman's words and take them one by one and thought, "This could be the ultimate guide to the universe," and had since listen to it as often as I can to remind me the important things in life. And I hope you too will find it helpful.

Here's the lyrics to Baz Luhrman's Everybody's Free To Wear Sunscreen:

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '99
Wear Sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be
it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by
scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
than my own meandering experience,
I will dispense this advice, now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth;
oh nevermind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded.
But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself, and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before
you and how fabulous you really looked,.
You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.
The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind;
the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing everyday that scares you

Sing

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss

Don't waste your time on jealousy;
sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind; the race is long,
and in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults;
if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life,
the most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives,
some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't,
maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't,
maybe you'll divorce at 40,
maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary,
what ever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much
or berate yourself either – your choices are half chance,
so are everybody else's.
Enjoy your body, use it every way you can,
don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it,
it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own..

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings, they're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on.
Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you get,
the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard;
live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander,
you too will get old and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young
prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you.
Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse;
but you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it.
Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal,
wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

Home for the Weekend!

Hey baby,

By this time, August 2011, we've moved back to KK for good, since June. Papa had to stay back because his job transfer takes time. But he will be joining us soon, ok?

But oh you miss him so much... You ask me to open photos of Papa every day. And every morning you wake up all you want to watch is videos of Papa... And in the evening when Mommy gets home from work, you ask me to call him... "Co' (call) Papa, Mommy.." You would say...

And darling Papa misses you too... If only you can understand the depths of his love and yearn to hold you again.. He complaints to me about missing you everyday, Micah. And I know it must hurt him not being able to see you as often, because it kills me not to see you in a day...

I can only hope that you understand why Mommy had to make the decision to move back here without waiting for Papa...

But hey, we're taking the plane to see Papa tomorrow! Isn't that exciting? I miss your Papa so much, and I know you do too. And i just can't wait for night to come so that we'll go to sleep and wake up the next morning to fly off home to Bintulu. Even though it's only going to be a four-day trip, I'm still super-excited about going home! To meet our family; your Kung Kung, Akek, aunties and lil cousins, to meet our friends there, eat the FOOOOOD there... ah, bliss...

Ok, Mommy's getting a lil carried away here. But hey, we're flying home, buddy! Let's pack!

Love,
Your Mommy

If...

If I Had My Child to Raise Over Again

by Diane Loomans

If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self esteem first, and the house later.
I'd fingerpaint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I would care to know less and know to care more.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often.
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.
I'd model less about the love of power,
And more about the power of love.

Dear son,

Mommy found this poem some time ago and it made me rethink about a lot of my decisions and actions especially in my daily struggle to balance between work and you and everything else..

If only I have a choice, I'd sing Just the Way you are with you a thousand times. I'd watch Toy Story with you over and over again. I'd draw random lines and nothings with you all afternoon. I'd walk with you as you pick up your choice of stones and little rocks. I'd do anything and everything with you, Micah... I just miss hanging out with you the whole day...

But beds need to be made, dishes need to be washed, mess needs to be cleaned, dirty laundry needs to be done, jobs have to be attended to, works have to completed.

But Mommy's doing her best, okay buddy? And just so you know, it's my favorite thing to do, something I look forward to doing after a hard or dull day's work... All I want is to get in the car pick you up at the daycare where you're waiting patiently at the doorstep, and jumping up and down excitedly at the sight of your mother... There's nothing I love more than being your mother, buddy. Just looking at you gives me joy and purpose. Apa lagi if I get to have more time with you, just layan your silly and singing. Hihi!

Love,

Your mother...

Gift from Aunt Courtney

Hey Son,
Here's something from your Aunt Courtney. =)

p/s: Every single word Barry Manilow sung in this song says exactly what Mommy feels about you. Thank u Ah Hui (Aunt Courtney's Chinese name. Shh! Don't membocorkan it =D)
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